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Avast! September 19 be Talk Like a Pirate Day, so haul yer best Pirate to yer ride and impress yer mates! (We be puttin' these here fer a laugh. We be not wantin' ye to do anythin' that might land ye in traction.) Don't be forgettin' yer eyepatch for yer post-ride grog, savvy? And nae stealin', either--that be the wrong spirit fer Talk Like a Pirate Day.
Before the ride -- "Arrrr, where be we goin'? Which one o' ye is the coxswain? Does every bilge rat have flat changin' tools?"
Car back -- "There be dragons."
Car up -- "Here be dragons."
Road hazard -- "Ahoy, mates! Watch yourselves o'er this ____."
Speeding up -- "Smartly, mates! This be not the time for slackin'!"
Stopping -- "Avast! There be a stop sign!"
And if someone ignores ride etiquette -- "Release the Kraken."
After the ride -- "Pass me the grog, mates, or be keelhauled."
Photo: Arrrr, bikes!